Dive:Adventurer - Parent Description: Has children Level: Level 1 Level Requirements: Has 1 or more children, biological or adopted, and treats him/her/them well Certified On:
Mar 22, 2020
Editor’s Note: On all dive certifications, we try to edit the writing as little as possible to preserve authenticity, personality, and writing style. We typically fix spelling errors, but minimally modify grammar and sentence structure (just enough to ensure readability).
1. When and Why Did You Decide to Pursue This Dive At This Level? What was your inspiration and motivation?
My wife and I knew well before doing so, that we wanted to have children. My personal belief is that leading by serving others brings meaning to life. As much as I wanted to experience the purposefulness of a life spent serving others, prior to having children I focused most of my energies on hobbies and crafts. Although the work at my job was always good at keeping me occupied and helping me feel fulfilled, almost everything I created lost all its value once it was completed. When I realized that, I knew I wanted to invest myself in something that would take on new meaning of its own with every passing day – a project that’s never completed.
2. How Long Did It Take For You To Accomplish This Dive At This Level From The Day You Decided To Pursue It, And Why Did It Take That Long?
It’s tough to say. You could say that every day of my life prior to the birth of my first child was spent learning the lessons I needed in order to be prepared. You could say, at the very least, that from the moment my wife and I began dating, we had begun slowly tackling the pre-requisites for this dive. Conception took us longer than some, but not as long as we had expected. This aspect of parenting will certainly be different for everyone who experiences it!
3. What Was The Hardest Part About Achieving This Particular Dive Level?
I don’t think child rearing is ever what we expect it to be at the start.
The biggest challenge in this case has been the greatest reward, and that is learning to put my self aside. I believe it’s important to keep some aspect of self intact (otherwise I think burnout and sub-par parenting could result), but it’s most important to be able to let go of self when the situation calls for it. I still struggle with that ‘letting go’ sometimes, but in the times when I am successful at it, I really do feel the most at peace with life.
Another thing I would rank as most challenging is continuously fine tuning the balance between: a) providing good leadership to my children and teaching them the importance of respecting authority while b) not breaking their will or leaving them feeling crushed. I struggle with this balance between “authoritarian parenting” and “learn by experience” parenting.
So to boil it all down to a single greatest challenge, I think the greatest challenge in being a good parent is learning how to maintain a fair and continuous balance.
4. What Was The Easiest Part About Achieving This Particular Dive Level?
In my case, making the babies was probably the easiest part. But as it relates to the day to day experience, I feel rewarded every day when my girls look to me and smile, or when they need me and I’m able to put down my worries about the world in order to just be there for them. The easiest part of parenting has come from the joy of getting to know my children as they have grown into their ability to express themselves.
5. What Is Your Advice For Someone Who Is Pursuing This Dive And Level?
We’re never ready. This one is a plunge into the great unknown. If you wait until you’re “ready”, either you’ll never do it, or you’ll find out you only THOUGHT you were ready. But if parenting is something you’re considering, don’t let that scare you. Know upfront that from the great unknown come some of life’s most beautiful surprises.
The best thing I think you can do if you’re considering parenting, is to begin a practice of mindful living. Learn to live in a state of mental flexibility, and try not to take yourself too seriously.
6. What Are Some Of The Best Resources You Recommend to Those Pursuing This Dive At This Level, And Why Do You Recommend Them? Please Include Relevant Weblinks, If Applicable.
As our first daughter began taking off on her own two feet, it became clear to me that I should begin to learn about what it takes to be a quality leader. I recommend ‘The Servant’ by James C. Hunter for a look at leadership that feels readily applicable to the realm of parenting. ‘The Road Less Traveled’ by M. Scott Peck, M.D. is a great resource that merges psychology, mindfulness, and love into one philosophy. Finally, ‘True Love’ by Thich Nhat Hanh is a phenomenal resource for anyone who wants to work towards the best of what it means to be human.
7. Tell Us A Story Of One Of Your Adventures While Pursuing This Dive (At This Level).
I remember when my oldest daughter was somewhere between 2 and 3 years old. I was washing the dishes. She came to me and said “daddy, come to my room and look at my cool new Frozen shoes and say [to] me: ‘wow, I love your new Frozen shoes, they’re SO cool!'” So I did. I turned off the water, followed her back to her room, and when she showed me her new Frozen shoes, I said “wow, I love your new Frozen shoes, they’re SO cool!” She laughed and put her shoes away, and she thanked me and went back to playing with her toys so I could finish the dishes. Sometimes parenting is just that simple.
8. What Evidence Did You Submit to Prove You Met the Requirements for This Dive and Level?
Check out these photos of my lovely daughter Allie!Staycation during the worldwide Covid-19 pandemic
She’s ready for commercials!
9. Will You Be Pursuing The Next Level For This Dive? If Yes, Why? If Not, Why Not?
I would assume so. I haven’t looked at what that entails yet, but I don’t plan on taking a break from being dad anytime soon, so I figure I might as well keep adding cool accomplishments to my profile and helping others in any way that I am able!
10. What is the Break Diver's Creed?
No Rules. No Excuses. No Regrets.
And having made this post, and provided adequate evidence to the dive committee, Rory Laird is now hereby certified by Break Diving, Inc. as: Adventurer - Parent - Level 1. Congratulations ! Thank you for being an inspiration to others!
The author above wrote this WYSEguidance post as one of the certification requirements to become certified by Break Diving, Inc. for a dive completed. Would you also like to find greater success, happiness, and friendship, and make genuine supportive connections with others around the world pursuing your same dreams? Come join us at Break Diving and soon your story will be the next one you read about on this site!